Tuesday, January 18, 2011

one step forward, half a mile back

Worn out, falling over, grasping at the last straw
hoping it'll hold me up for just a moment longer
hoping with each step I take I'll somehow come out stronger
breaking down, giving up, heart cracked in two through a fatal flaw.

each step forward feels like another mile run
on shattered legs, with rasping lungs
death of everything i thought was given back to me
losing sight of everything I thought I'd finally learned to see

a whirlwind spinning out of control, sweeping away the pieces of my life
dust and debris and dirty broken secrets
regret for all the words I couldn't hold back
feeble apologies, bandaids to hide the knifes I twisted in their hearts
why am i so tired?

stop. peace, be still. rest in the center of the storm,
the still center of the whirling world. do not lose heart
let the wind batter, the world rage, the weight of glory fall
heavy on tired shoulders. He gives me strength to bear it.

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